I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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