So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
