He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
