other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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