Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
