But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
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