Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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