My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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