Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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