As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
