So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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