She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
