and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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