Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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