I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
