So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
