I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
