sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
you had me at cake vodka
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
