Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
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