am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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