So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize
