Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
