Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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