listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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