I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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