Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.

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  (310): i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details. http://tfl.nu/0mu6
  Replies (4) Good night (794) Bad night (2278)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.

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  (586): You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup. http://tfl.nu/ddou
  Replies (10) Good night (3341) Bad night (1214)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.

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  (613): It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over. http://tfl.nu/tn8v
  Replies (9) Good night (1186) Bad night (3470)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong

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  (740): You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong http://tfl.nu/17fl
  Replies (11) Good night (3266) Bad night (1028)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad

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  (203): The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad http://tfl.nu/q1tx
  Replies (16) Good night (3371) Bad night (1087)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks

  (1403): View more from

  That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills

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  (403): Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks (1403): That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills http://tfl.nu/uobi
  Replies (2) Good night (1465) Bad night (679)
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  (44): View more from United Kingdom

  I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.

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  (44): I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game. http://tfl.nu/cpwc
  Replies (2) Good night (1487) Bad night (621)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself

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  (540): Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself http://tfl.nu/tr5c
  Replies (3) Good night (1340) Bad night (769)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having

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  (607): Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having http://tfl.nu/7a1k
  Replies (7) Good night (1526) Bad night (726)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress

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  (757): do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress http://tfl.nu/1usj
  Replies (4) Good night (1217) Bad night (495)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)

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  (774): I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-) http://tfl.nu/aq14
  Replies (8) Good night (1650) Bad night (662)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?

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  (412): my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush? http://tfl.nu/kyl4
  Replies (3) Good night (863) Bad night (492)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob

  (1-931): View more from Tennessee

  Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic

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  (931): He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob (1-931): Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic http://tfl.nu/rfmh
  Replies (4) Good night (1667) Bad night (514)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch

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  (440): No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch http://tfl.nu/as9g
  Replies (1) Good night (594) Bad night (331)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story

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  (416): Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story http://tfl.nu/faox
  Replies (0) Good night (253) Bad night (117)

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