He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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