I want to walk on stilts...naked
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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