Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
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