you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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