i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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