Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
You're a waste of cheezeits
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
