i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
