She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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