Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
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I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
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Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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