Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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