GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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