What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
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