They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
pop tarts are not kleenex
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
She's the barista slut.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
