Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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