i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
