I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
