watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
