okay pat passed out under dana's car
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Randomize
