I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
