You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize