There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
