thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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