apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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