Don't make out with my wife yet
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
