i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize