North Korea, Best Korea!
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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